Shut-off valve…

Sometimes I like to turn my phone into airplane mode just to make sure that there’s not a part of my mind cycling around the thought, “Someone might text, someone might call,” like a gerbil on an exercise wheel.  Does that gerbil not wanna come out and have a little rest?  Maybe a nap?  Why does that guy just constantly wanna whir my head with the anticipation of being contacted?

I’ve definitely been conditioned to the sound of a buzzing phone.  If I hear my phone buzz, then I basically cannot function until I’ve AT LEAST seen why.  That’s why those fake notifications from Twitter are so annoying…pretending like they’re a news source.  You’re not the buzz I want, Twitter!

I like being contacted…I like it very much.  It gives me hope that my corpse will not one day rot into my bed.  But I find it refreshing to not be available sometimes…to allow myself space from triggers.  To me every message or notification is a trigger of some sort…some are good, some are bad, some are infuriating, and some are my friends’ faces made to look like rabbits…EVERYONE LOOKS CUTE AS A RABBIT!!!

When I put my phone on airplane mode, I feel isolated.  I wouldn’t do it all day, but it’s  a good time to check in with myself…see how Suzanne’s really doing.  You eating enough?  Do any exercise today?  What are you looking forward to?  I mean, what’s  a healthy amount to talk to yourself?  Isn’t it all ok as long as I don’t start thinking the world is a conspiracy?

Or have I entered Crazy Town?

Well, too late now, but it’s at least kinda fun over here!  Look!  A monkey riding  a motorcycle!!!*

*one of my dad’s classic lines.

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